Wu-Tang Cover Art Awesomeness

So I realize this is a bit of a late pass, but my life has been in a sort of constant transition in the last couple weeks, so I’m going to try and catch up on some stuff I meant to write over the next few days.

First off, these are both just fantastic. That out of the way, here are a few reasons.

One, it’s been a bit of a rough year for the Wu in my eyes. Sure, they had the (sort of) critically acclaimed (sort of) album a few months back, but they’re like the only group in hip-hop that can get away with calling weird tangential projects like those albums under the same brand name. Aside from that, Raekwon (and countless others) have been needlessly beefing with Joe Budden, Gza has just been baiting young rappers by the bound for even less apparent reason, Ghost has been putting out a mediocre Ron Browz feature and a similalry rousing lead single, but then these gems come through and (albeit temporarily) save the day.

One of the greatest things about these dudes is the shit they can pull off when they’re not taking themselves even slightly seriously. Half their raps feel like that, most of O.D.B.’s television appearances obviously felt like that, Ghost’s persona has walked this line on many occasions, the Red & Meth albums: and nothing says not taking themselves too seriously like these goofy-ass covers. I could expound on my love for Chekwon or scantily-clad Oz for a lot more words here, but I’ll let you find your own affection for the respective mixtape/album covers. All I know is, something feels right again now that silliness reigns in Wu’ville.

BOSS: The Real Rick Ross Conspiracy

These cards actually have Pablo Noriega on speed dial

If you thought the corrections officer “Perfect Attendance” award was a controversy, then have we got a smoking gun for you (see what we did there?).*

This news story had largely been flying under the radar, but after some extensive research (read: several Google searches and an ad we saw while half-awake on a subway) we’ve got this exclusive scoop for the people.

Some Ish I Wrote: Killa Cam(era Obscura) Edition

All dressed up and only twelve places to go...

So I wrote this feature for The Tripwire about Camera Obscura a brief while ago, and it’s up on their website now. Aside from some technical difficulties it was a pretty enjoyable experience, and I thought the artwork (which I can take no credit for) turned out great. We talk a lot about David Lynch and misconceptions about the meanings of their music. Check it out if you get a chance.

Much love,
Adam

Camera Obscura: The Little Blue Key (The Tripwire)

O.P.B(logs): The Thugged Out Andre 3K Edition

Don't let the outfit fool you, I'll knock your block back to 1972 (where you can buy me another pair of these pants).

O.P.B(logs). is a section where we take a look at just that: Other People’s Blogs. We use this as a forum to point out other fine folks ballin’ outta control on their blog game , and we sometimes add our own cent or two to the discussion (we can’t be guaranteeing two cents — recessions hit hard, people).

So this weekend The Smoking Section did a list of Andre 3000′s top 5 hard-ass verses of all time. I took the time to read it part because I’m a sucker for just about anything related to Outkast, but also because I thought it was a sort of novel concept. If you could view a lineup of the 50 or so best rappers in the game, Andre Benjamin might be the least likely candidate to come and lyrically smack you down, unless your biggest fear in life happens to be prep football stars from the 1920s. But that’s also part of what makes him work so well on every level, much less on the rare occasions when he does get all riled up. His hard rhymes aren’t postured on an entire thug persona complete with fabricated backstory and urban fashion line, it’s just Dre and his lyrical mastery.

TSS’s list, which is mostly early to mid Outkast catologue material, is definitely worth checking out. Highlighting this period of the duo’s career seems logical as it’s largely the portion most folks get nostalgic for as we wait around in agony for a new album. But one verse that always struck me as a fitting example of Andre’s combination of tenacity, individuality and downright silliness was his guest spot on Rich Boy’s “Throw Some D’s” remix. Granted, it’s hard to take a song with a Jim Jones verse that includes the line “I got a chest cold and I might sneeze on the bitch” too seriously, but Dre comes hard. This sequence in particular always stuck with me.

“But if you wanna try it, sucker, now then we can do it
Ha ha sleep, Tylenol PM if I pull it
Sh-sh-sheep, count ‘em for the rest of ya life
Yeah yeah, ya partner got away but now he vegetable-like
So so, I sent his mom and dad a whole case of V8
He can die, any second, how much long it’s gon’ take?”

He’s on some rare form cold shit like we’ve rarely seen in the post-”Hey Ya,” happy-go lucky, plaid-suited Dre,  but the V8 line brings a sort of humor to it like he could do these things if he was really in the mood, but why would he want to when he’s got on such a fun silly hat? His flow also makes it sound like he’s just sitting on the beach somewhere effortlessly churning out these rhymes, and  this makes it all the more impressive. But mostly, anyone that can make predominantly tomato-based juice gangsta can tuck not one, but several feathers in their cap in BSS’s book. Log out.

Andre 3000′s 5 Hardest Verses [The Smoking Section]

My Week In Lists: The Music+Alcohol Mixology List

We here at BSS have sort of been rocking out to that new Bacardi commercial that uses Matt & Kim‘s “Daylight”* all week. At first we had to chickity check ourselves for rocking out to a Bacardi commercial, but then we realized the song still totally bangs and the whole “they sold out to those corporate whores at Outback Steakhouse” spiel was so 2004. Like these haters didn’t secretly want a Bloomin’ Onion before they even deleted their illegally downloaded copies of The Sunlandic Twins.

The thing with “Daylight” is that it’s not really about mojitos at all, but it made that party seem quite delightful, and would surely be nice background music to such a beverage. But it got us thinking, what are the best songs that blame it on specific types of alcohol? Here’s our list of the best 10, with the catch that only one song can make the cut per specific type of alcohol (i.e. “Whiskey Girl” & “Whiskey Bottle” would not be allowed to each have a place on said list). Feel free to disagree with us or tell us we must have been drunk for not choosing _______________.

My Week In Lists: Harry Potter and the Awkward Innuendo

"On Wednesdays we wear pink."

The New York Times, with its finger firmly on the pulse of the day’s important issues, dares to ask the question on no one’s mind: Does Hogwarts have a drinking problem? (Sidenote: Yes, I get bored during work, and yes, sometimes that leads me to read the NYT health blog.) Basically, Harry and his friends get crunk in the new movie and some parents are concerned this sets a bad example for their darling Muggle children. It also contains the shocking revelation that children laugh at drunk-acting people. (“As the mother of a 10-year-old Harry Potter fan, I was taken aback by the reaction of the young people in the theater. They snickered at Hermione’s goofy grin and, later, guffawed when an inebriated Hagrid passed out.” Yeah, because it was HILARIOUS.)

Like the patriotic Americans we are, BSS also saw Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince last week, and honestly, just like the dismayed parents in this article, it wasn’t what we were expecting. Which is to say, it played much more like the awesome PG Hogwarts version of American Pie than a kids’ movie about wizards, and we were reminded of this today when reading this article. (And let’s be real: if you were charged with saving the wizarding world from evil incarnate, wouldn’t you need to get wasted from time to time too?)

So the latest Harry Potter, surprisingly, featured more awkward, vaguely sexual jokes than we could have anticipated, the highlight of which was undoubtedly the exchange between Ron and Harry after Harry and Ginny put the Half-Blood Prince’s potions book in the Room of Requirement and subsequently got their mack on. (Ron: “Did you guys do it?” Harry: “Excuse me?” Ron: “You know, hide the book.”) That moment alone was worth the $10.50 (damn East Coast prices!) admission fee. I don’t even care that it wasn’t in the book.

In honor of awkward innuendo and questionable, potentially underage drinking, we got to thinking about our love of the true classics of the teen movie genre, which inevitably feature both as major plot points (here’s looking at you, Can’t Hardly Wait), and decided a little match-up was in order.

Harry Potter and the Teen Movie Archetypes, after the jump.

Basketbizarro: Starbury’s 24-hour Live Video Stream

Who's getting a face tattoo in 10 years? This guy! (photo from Vedia's FlickR)

Former NBA All-Star and current self-parody artist Stephon Marbury is videotaping himself and his daily routine for 24 straight hours. No real context or explaination as to why has been given, but none is really necessary. For those of you like myself who have desk jobs, or even for those who don’t but have a spare lunch hour or some time to kill when you get home, I dare say this link as worth at least a few moments of your time.

24 Hours of Starbury

For those of you who need some sort of background before you just unthinkably click up your anytime minutes…

My Week In Lists: The “I Hate My Own Genre” Songlist

Imagine how good he could play with his eyes open...

Earlier this week the Beasties and Nas teamed up to release a track called “Too Many Rappers.” The collaboration seems logical enough, as the pairing feels like a perpetual Rock The Bells headliner and Nas seems to be the speed-dial lately of most everyone who needs a crotchety old man verse against all the tomfoolery these kids are doing with the dancing and the swag and the pudding pops.

The song is pretty decent and collaboration is noteworthy in theory, but the concept has certainly become a bit played in the rap realm (though we will have a perpetual soft spot for dead prez’s “Hip Hop”). Yeah, we get it. Dudes would have been laughed off your block back in the day for “The Stanky Legg.” And sure, Rick Ross maybe doesn’t really have Pablo Noriega’s name in the ol’ Rolodex. But only rapping about these things makes you seem like those old dudes at the playground convincing the youngbloods the hook shot is the only real shot in basketball. And it’s even trickling down to the youth. Joe Budden seems to be making a career out of this “Wack MC’s” concept, and dude is only 29!

While hip-hop hating didn’t seem so ripe for parody, the concept of writing a song bemoaning your own subgenre still intrigued us. So we thought we’d take a look at five of the most interesting examples of this in some other musical realms. Feel free to add your own personal favorites in the comments.

Click through to see our list.

El Futbol: Burger King Ad Dudes Score Goooooooooooool!

Apparently this dude is really worried about the whole after Labor Day thing...

Normally we don’t post on the unveiling of new soccer kits, but sometimes things like this happen and you just have no choice.

Every now and then, someone from advertising, PR or marketing comes up with that million-dollar idea, like the guy (or girl, but in this case presumably guy) who thought about putting brand names on the butt of female sweatpants. Well, one of the folks at Burger King just put that guy to shame.

So if you’ve watched a professional soccer game say like, ever, you probably at least vaguely remember someone scoring a goal, running like a madman to the corner flag and pulling his jersey up over his face. You know, it shows off those abs and maybe simulates what it would be like if he were a blind man who’d just scored a goal and ran to the corner flag to be adored, I guess. They’re not working with an endzone here, cut ‘em some slack.

In seemingly unrelated news, Spanish La Liga club Getafe CF recently unveiled their new Burger King sponsored uniforms. Upon immediate cheesy photo op, they look just as ridiculously cheesy as a Burger King logo on bright soccer jersey could be expected to.

But wait… there’s more. When you pull the jersey over your head, this happens.

Yes indeedy, boys and girls. Instead of your face, The King basks in your goal with you! Now I know what you’re thinking. This ruins the integrity of the game. This takes advertising beyond its boundaries. This is creepier than the Rio Ferdinand sex tape. Well good golly Batman, aren’t you an Eagle Scout. You’re not not right. But you’re ignoring how shamelessly awesome this promotion is. And hey, lest we forget about the not- so-dapper dandies who could actually use the King as an improvement to their goal-face, like Wayne Rooney.

So while these bad boys will be busy taking La Liga by storm until Getafe’s lawyers can rework the fine print in their sponsorship deal, BSS has some ideas for what to do with all the leftovers shirts after they inevitably become the laughing stock of Spain.

Concerted Efforts: Dirty Projectors (7/20 @ Williamsburg Waterfront)

Even our poses are experimental... (Photo: Sarah Cass)

Even in the park
Chilling screams and harmonies
Projected quite well

Dave Longstreth’s Brooklyn collective Dirty Projectors have certainly attained the status of a buzz band. This is neither a good nor a bad thing, merely an observation. But such a buzz can be the result of so many different things: a particular cosign, a glowing review from the right publication, a standout record or even a gimmick. But while the Projectors lie somewhere in the land between the glowing review and the record itself, the recognition they’re getting marks this “buzz” as easily the most endearing type: the long overdue praise and attention showered onto an act that’s been making unique and worthwhile music for nearly a decade and has finally hit its high-water mark. So while it was obviously a free concert with a picturesque backdrop, it’s still sort of heartwarming to see hundreds of people in line to see a band like this.

In saying all this, I had my worries about the actual performance. Their music is layered, booming but polished, a sound that often cannot carry over to an outdoor venue all that effectively, much less one featuring the echo of competitive dodgeball in the distance. The sound could either overpower the band itself or get lost in the crowded park. But it did neither of these things. The louder and chaotic the music became, the more the sound simply engulfed the park and took over, both entirely capturing a crowd with several causes for distraction and creating an even more notable contrast and intimacy to the subtler tracks like “Temecula Sunrise.”

The crowd roared for the intro to “Stillness In The Move” and the song, possibly aided by the backdrop of the river and the city, created a beautiful moment. Then songs like “Rise Above” captured the more dynamic and driving force of the band. But the show-stealing moment was the bizarre intro to “Remade Horizon.” The track begins with frantic, almost yodel-like trade-off vocal harmonies between Amber and Angel. It’s a breathtaking moment, but once that seems unlikely to be reproduced at a live show. But the two women did just that, inspiring the biggest awe of the evening and disproving all my worries less than 30 seconds into the song.